All Boys, Broken Trailer Lights, and Life Lessons
Hello! I’m the momma behind this crazy household of boys and I wouldn’t want it any other way.
It’s full throttle, no looking back, go for it, broken things are everywhere, and yet completely amazing! Raising these three boys is the joy of my life. It’s truly the most rewarding work I have ever experienced. Sometimes, I feel completely unqualified.
Being a “mom among boys” is constant and non-stop being present, teaching, reteaching, chore charts, summer schedules, and sometimes locking myself in my room or, my personal favorite, my minivan for a much needed self pep talk! I need those moments to remind myself about the big picture goal here and that it is all going to be just fine.
It seems that the boys wait for those hard or just plain exhausting moments to decide to destroy something, “Mom, I ran the lawnmower into the trailer and broke out all the lights on the right side.” Really? Can I please just give these boys a chore without something ending up broke? This is why it is easier to just do everything myself! Of course, they will never learn anything with this mentality. Although, there would be less destruction! Thankfully, in this situation, I stopped what I was doing and invested in my son’s development process. The young married me would have waited for my husband to get home. I would have waited for the exact right moment to tell him, and he would have sighed, dropped his head, and then fixed it. But I didn’t do that, not fifteen years into parenting and nineteen years into marriage. Could my husband fix it to perfection better than anyone else in our home. Of course. But would I really be doing my job as a parent/mom if I didn’t teach my boys how to solve their own problems? Nope. A basic life skill that I hope to pass on is the willingness to try. You don’t need to know how to do it perfectly, you just need to be brave enough to try.
Do I have all the answers or sometimes even know how to fix their predicaments? The answer is no, I don’t. I, who has never replaced a trailer light, did what every human does when they need to figure something out. I YouTube’ed it! I watched the video and guided my oldest on how to remove the trailer light and rewire it, clamp it, and tape the wires. This isn’t the easiest way. It was an hour long effort. It took a trip to the local auto parts store and a little education in drivers side vs passenger side lights. Apparently, flipping it upside down and mounting it isn’t a thing. I ended up having to buy the entire trailer light kit. But, now we know how and no one will need to watch a YouTube video the next time. On the plus side, I have the driver side light ready and waiting. Knowing my boys, I’m sure it will come in handy!
Mommas, the moral of the story is if you are a mom raising boys (or kids in general), married or single, our job is to allow these boys the opportunity to mess up. Yes, messing up is okay. It is part of the process. It builds confidence and teaches them how to repair and overcome their mishaps in life. Right now it’s a trailer light, in a few years it may be something else, possibly something larger, physically or metaphorically. But what is my son’s take-away? He didn’t pout and no one was a victim of the lawnmower or the placement of the trailer. He messed up, he fell down, but he got up and fixed his mistake. Never wait on someone else to do what you are capable of doing. Son, you are capable, I believe in you and you can do this. The years I have to teach my boys these lessons are short, but I hope they serve them for their entire lives.
